why today?????

this is a beautiful bouquet of flowers Tim suprised me with Sat. night when he got home. First question what did you do??? LOL Of course today I have an appointment I can't get out of due to workmans comp & it's in lincoln so I have to travel through the notch....just a wee bit nervous.....ok a whole lot of nervous. any one that knows me knows I am terrified of winter weather. Yes my brother will be driving but it doesn't make it any better, so not looking forward to this at all! Seems how I'll be good & tense that will make the pain level esculate more than I already am in....owell.

I'm still having fun creating the layouts for my kids"all about you from a to z" I'm focusing on hopefully finishing zacs tonight, dinner is already in the crock pot....pot roast, carrots & potatoes...so I should be able to just relax & work on that while hubby will be out snowblowing the driveways. The kids are hoping to have a snow day tomorrow & play outside.We were finally able to buy them sleds...they were so hard to find anywhere this year & quite pricey too. Maybe they'll get Uncle to go play with them....tonight Rich & Krsytal are cooking chicken cordon bleu together...it's a special tradition they try to do when he's home. Time to get ready for that dreaded trip...LIVE, LAUGH, & LOVE.

a good day....

I CANNOT BELIEVE WE ARE HEADING INTO ANOTHER DEEP FREEZE THIS WEEK...I CANNOT WAIT FOR SPRING TO GET HERE. TODAY ZAC & I WERE THE ONLY ONES HOME SO WE WENT TO THE MOVIES.....I HAD NEVER BEEN DURING THE DAY WEIRD WALKING OUT & IT STILL BE DAYLIGHT. WE SAW MALL COP, VERY CUTE & DEFINATLY APPROPRIATE FOR KIDS. GRANTED SITTIN IN A MOVIE THEATRE IS NOT EASY FOR ME TO DO, A LOT OF WIGGLING TRYING TO GET COMFY, BUT THE PAIN IS WORTH THE QUALITY TIME I GOT TO SPEND ALONE WITH MY WONDERFUL SON! USUALLY IN HIS FREE MOMENTS FROM SCHOOL HE'S BUSY DOING CHORES & WORK AROUND HERE (BEING THE MAN OF THE HOUSE:) ) SO I FIGURED TRY TO DO SOMETHING FUN & THAT I WAS ABLE TO DO. THEN WE WENT FOR LUNCH....HE IS ADDICTED TO HADDOCK RIGHT NOW, SO HE HAD GOOD OLE FISH & CHIPS, I STUCK WITH A CALZONE.
ONE OF THE PROJECTS I'M WORKING ON IS LAYOUTS FOR EACH ONE OF MY KIDS...CALLED A TO Z ALL ABOUT YOU....YOU WOULD THINK IT WOULD BE SIMPLE TO THINK UP WORDS WITH THE BEGINNING LETTER OF THE ALPHABET....IT IS FOR SOME WORDS BUT OTHERS IT IS A CHALLENGE. ALSO I HAVE NOTICED IT HAS BROUGHT ON MANY EMOTIONS OF SMILES & TEARS, MAKES ME REALLY THINK ABOUT HOW GREAT EACH OF THE 3 ARE & HOW BLESSED I AM THAT THEY ARE MY CHILDREN....ENJOY YOUR WEEKEND & REMEMBER HOW SPECIAL EACH ONE OF YOUR CHILDREN ARE IN THERE OWN UNIQUE WAYS.

too funny

LAST NIGHT TIM HAD TO WORK LATE & THEN HAD TO STOP AT MY DADS TO SET UP A NEW COMPUTER (LUCKY DAD GOT DSL)...KRYSTAL IS GETTING VERY ANXIOUS TO GET HER ROOM DONE SO SHE CAN MOVE IN, SO SHE ASKED IF SHE & BRIE COULD GO SAND THE WALLS & CEILING.....TIM JUST HASN'T HAD THE TIME & I OBVIOUSLY CAN'T DO IT, SO I SAID SURE WHY NOT....I COULDN'T HELP BUT TAKE A FEW PICTURES OF HER WHEN I COULD STOP LAUGHING.

DARTMOUTH WENT OK, ANOTHER PAIN KILLER TO TRY & AT LEAST THIS ONE ISN'T SUPPOSE TO KILL MY KIDNEY & LIVER. I'VE BEEN EATING YOGURT FOR LUNCH & PUTTIN THE OLE' CRANBERRY JUICE TO HOPEFULLY HELP FLUSH OUT THE BAD STUFF. I SWEAR TO GOD THEY MUST OF PUT A MILLION POT HOLES & BUMPS IN THE ROADS ALL THE WAY DOWN, I FELT EACH & EVERY ONE OF THEM & WAS IN SOOOOOOO MUCH PAIN & IN TEARS BY THE TIME WE GOT THERE...TIM WAS TRYING TO AVOID AS MUCH AS HE COULD BUT IN THE NO. COUNTRY THAT IS ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE.

YESTERDAY I JUST DID A LOT OF RESTING & WORKED A LITTLE ON A SCRAPBOOK LAYOUT. TODAY I HAD LUNCH WITH MY MOM & GRAM WHICH WAS VERY NICE, IT'S BEEN A VERY LONG TIME SINCE WE HAD DONE THAT. KRYSTAL & ZAC HAVE BEEN DOING MID TERMS ALL WEEK LONG & ARE GETTING BURNT OUT FROM ALL THE TESTING & STUDYING...THEY GET OUT OF SCHOOL AT 11 TOMORROW. MY BRIE HAS DISCOVERED THE INTERNET AT SCHOOL & SET UP HER OWN EMAIL....THAT GIRL IS JUST WAY TO SMART. I SWEAR SOMEDAYS SHES A 30 YR. OLD TRAPPED IN A CHILDS BODY!!! WE'RE ALL ENJOYING OUR FAVORITE WINTER ENTERTAINMENT ON TUES/WED NIGHTS...AMERICAN IDOL....LOVE THAT SHOW!!! BE CREATIVE....

Today....

HOW EXCITING THAT TODAY IS THE OFFICIAL DAY OF CHANGE FOR OUR WONDERFUL COUNTRY! I AM SOOOOOO HAPPY BUSH IS OUT OF OFFICE AS OF TODAY, THIS DAY COULDN'T COME QUICK ENOUGH FOR ME. JUST A FEW UPDATES....FRIDAY MOM WENT TO DART. TO SEE THE EYE DR, SHE ABSOLUTLY CAN DO NOTHING FOR A COUPLE OF WEEKS SO HOPEFULLY HER EYE WILL HEAL ITSELF, NO PROMISES BUT THERE IS A LITTLE HOPE SHE WILL REGAIN FULL SIGHT WITH NO FUTURE PROBLEMS. KRYSTAL WILL BE STARTING WITH THE CARDIOLOGIST ON FEB 3RD. WE PRAY FOR ANSWERS FOR OUR LITTLE GIRL, SADLY THERE WILL BE ALOT OF TESTING SHE WILL HAVE TO ENDURE AGAIN, BUT TO FINALLY GET STRAIGHT ANSWERS TRULY WILL BE A BLESSING. OF COURSE WE STILL HAVE TO WATCH THE BLOOD WORK & THE SWOLLEN LYMPHNOIDS VERY CLOSELY, SO WE CAN'T CANCEL OUT THE CANCER SCARE AS OF YET. THE SEIZURES STILL ARE NOT UNDER CONTROL, BUT THE NEURO HOPES THAT IF WE CAN FIX THE HEART IT MAY HELP WITH THE SEIZURES & CHRONIC MIGRAINS.
HOPE EVERYONE MANAGED TO STAY WARM DURING THAT FREEZE WE WERE IN FOR A FEW DAYS, 3AM FRIDAY WE HAD OUR FRIEND GENE AT OUR HOUSE TO FIX THE FURNACE....COME TO FIND OUT THE FUEL FILTER OUTSIDE ON THE TANK WAS ALMOST COMPLETLY FROZEN, SO THEY HAD TO GO OUT & WORK IN THE -38 DEGREE WEATHER. LUCKILY IT WASN'T HAVING TO REPLACE THE WHOLE UNIT... SATURDAY, WE HAD TO GO GET MORE FUEL & TOOK THE KIDS TO HOGIES...TIM & I ARE SO ADDICTED TO THE GARLIC DOTS....THERE FOOD IS SOOOOOOO YUMMY. SUNDAY IT SNOWED ALL DAY, BUT WE DIDN'T GET AS MUCH AS EXPECTED. YESTERDAY THE KIDS WERE HOME FROM SCHOOL, WE LOST POWER FOR QUITE A WHILE, LUCKILY THE SUN WAS SHINING THROUGH THE WINDOWS TO KEEP THE HEAT IN....POOR ZAC WAS IN THE SHOWER WHEN WE LOST IT, SO HAD TO JUMP OUT WITH SHAMPOO STILL IN HIS HAIR..LOL...TODAY ANOTHER TRIP TO DARTMOUTH FOR ME WITH MY NEURO. OH GOODIE MORE PILLS TO TAKE! MY STOMACH IS TAKEN A BEATEN FROM ALL THESE DIFFERENT MEDS....I HATE PILLS & WAS ALWAYS AGAINST THEM, BUT IF SOMEHOW I CAN NUMB SOME OF THIS PAIN I'LL TRY IT. DEFINATLY SICK OF LIVING WITH THIS NON STOP EVERYDAY PAIN, BUT MY DAUGHTER HAS BEEN VERY INSPIRING TO ME, I SEE WHAT SHE LIVES WITH EVERYDAY & SHE HAS SUCH A GREAT ATTITUDE THAT SHE MAKES ME STRONGER. I DO MISS MY DAILY LIFE OF BEING ABLE TO DO TONS OF COOKING, CLEANING, WORKING & BEING WITH THE PEOPLE I THOUGHT WERE FRIENDS. BUT I WILL GET THROUGH THIS & I ENJOY THINKIN OF THINGS I WANT TO CREATE & TRY WORKING ON PROJECTS A LITTLE AT A TIME.....MY WORD FOR THE YEAR IS "BELIEVE"...I TRY TO JUST KEEP THAT IN MIND EVERYDAY.

quick update

BABY IT IS COLD OUTSIDE & ONLY GONNA GET WORSE THE NEXT COUPLE OF DAYS!!! HOPE EVERYONE MANAGES TO BEABLE TO STAY INSIDE & KEEP WARM. KRYSTAL HAD HER APPT. WITH DR. UMA YESTERDAY, HE INCREASED THE SEIZURE MEDS & ALSO BELIEVES IT COULD BE HER HEART TOO, SO NEXT STEP IS TO SEE THE CARDIOLOGIST....I PRAY SOMEONE FINDS OUT ANSWERS SOMEWHERE SO THIS POOR CHILD CAN HAVE A NORMAL LIFE. MY MOMS' EYE IS GETTING WORSE, SHE HAS LOST MOST SIGHT IN IT, I FEEL SO HELPLESS...CAN'T HELP MYSELF TO ANY RELIEF FROM THE DAILY PAIN, CAN'T HELP MY BEAUTIFUL DAUGHTER OR MY MOM.....SOMETHING HAS GOT TO GIVE SOMEWHERE. I AM STILL TRYING TO KEEP WITH MY GOAL OF FINDING A POSITIVE IN EVERYDAY & HAVE BEEN TRYING TO KEEP A DAILY JOURNAL TO VENT, WRITE ABOUT THE GOOD & BADS OF EVERYDAY...GRANTED I'VE MISSED A FEW DAYS, BUT I'LL KEEP AT IT.
ZAC STARTED HIS RIFLE TEAM WITH JROTC TONIGHT, SO HE'S EXCITED ABOUT THAT. I'M HAPPY HE IS FINALLY INVOLVED IN SOMETHING FOR HIM. HE HAS TURNED INTO SUCH A WONDERFUL YOUNG MAN THIS YEAR, ALWAYS TRYING TO HELP HIS MAMA & DOING MANLY THINGS AROUND HERE & FOR HIS GRAMMIE THAT WE CAN'T DO. TIM BEING GONE SO MUCH DOESN'T LEAVE HIM MUCH TIME FOR ALL THE HONEY DO THINGS & I TRY NOT TO BURDEN HIM MUCH ONCE HE GETS HOME AFTER A VERY VERY LONG & STRESSFUL DAY AT WORK. HAVE A GREAT DAY & KEEP WARM!

not so quiet weekend

FRIDAY NIGHT ZAC BROUGHT HOME A BABY....A COMPUTERIZED BABY THAT IS, CALLED BABY THINK IT OVER. IT'S DESIGNED TO SHOW TEEN KIDS SOMEWHAT WHAT IT IS LIKE TO HAVE A BABY. I HAVE TO SAY I AM SO PROUD OF HIM FOR COMPLETING THE WHOLE WEEKEND OF TAKING CARE OF IT INCLUDING THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT CHANGING OF THE DIAPERS & FEEDINGS. HE JUST CAME HOME & TOLD ME HE GOT A 93/100....SO I'M VERY IMPRESSED & VERY VERY PROUD OF HIM. SEEMED WEIRD TO BE LAYING IN BED A NIGHT & HEARING A NEWBORN CRYING AGAIN..LOL...NEEDLESS TO SAY I DON'T THINK I HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT MY SON WANTING A BABY ANYTIME SOON! SAT. WE HAD TO BRING BRIE TO A FRIENDS HOUSE FOR A BDAY PARTY & GET KEROSINE. WE TOOK THE KIDS TO HOAGIES FOR LUNCH...ONE OF MY FAVORITE RESTURAUNTS AROUND..TIM & I ARE ADDICTED TO THERE GARLIC DOTS (BREAD STICK PIECES SMOTHERED IN GARLIC & BUTTER)! WE GOT A BIG LAUGH BECAUSE ZACS BABY DECIDED TO WAKE UP & NEEDED TO BE CHANGED RIGHT AS WE STARTED TO EAT...BOY DID THAT BRING BACK MEMORIES! YESTERDAY WE RAN TO SHAWS TO PICK UP A FEW THINGS REAL QUICK & TIM SNOWBLOWED FOR 3 HOURS...WE WERE ONLY SUPPOSE TO GET 1-3 INCHES BUT ENDED UP BEING ABOUT 7 INCHES OF THAT WHITE STUFF THAT I AM SO READY TO SEE GO AWAY. TODAY KRYSTAL ATTEMPTED TO GO TO SCHOOL & ONLY LASTED A COUPLE OF HOURS, SHE IS STILL SO WORN OUT FROM LAST THURS. WE TAKE HER TO HER NEURO TOMORROW AFTERNOON, HOPEFULLY WE CAN FINALLY GET SOME ANSWERS. SO HORRIBLE TO SEE HER LAYING THERE LIFELESS, NO COLOR, WEAK, ETC; TIME TO GO FINISH WORKING ON A FEW CARDS I'M MAKING....KEEP WARM

the call i've been dreading....

Yesterday morning seemed to start as any normal day the kids off to school & tim off to work, me laying low trying what to try to create....than that suddenly all changed with one phone call. A call in knew in my heart I would probably get one day but was praying I wouldn't...Krystal was at Mountain View for her hospitality courses & had passed out. The poor lady that was trying to tell me what was going on was from a foreign country so her english wasn't very clear, but I could tell it wasn't good. I knew it would take me a bit to get there seems how we were having a blizzard & I was alone.. yes mom was home but with a broken right foot it wasn't much help. It's funny how my huge fear of winter driving went away trying to get to my baby. I arrived at the hotel to get her, still not fully aware of what was going on, I took her to the high school which is just up the road to see the nurse, her blood pressure was 80/60, so the nurse & I decided it would be best to call the ambulance as I was now over 20 miles from the hospital. She had had at least one more seizure in the ambulance. I totally lost it. Of course then my cell was ringin off the hook from anyone who suspected it was her, Tim, mom, etc; she was just so lifeless. Tim & I sat there in the ER watching the monitors & patiently waiting for the dr to come in with some sort of news. Over 7 hrs & no real answers except they feel she must of had a seizure or migrain complications. Definatly a call I pray never happens again....so scary to be so helpless!

stress reliever...

MONDAY NIGHT I WAS TOTALLY OVERWHELMED WITH MY APPT IN DHMC ON TUES. SO I HAD TO GO IN MY ROOM TO JUST GET GOOD & INKY & CREATE SOMETHING...PLUS I'M IN A BDAY CARD SWAP TO GIVE ME SOME MOTIVATION TO CREATE. THIS IS ONE OF THE CARDS I CAME UP WITH. IT WAS TOTALLY FUN & DID THE TRICK OF RELAXING ME FOR A WHILE.

YESTERDAY I HAD AN APPT & IT HAD IT'S UPS & DOWNS, GUESS IT DEPENDS ON HOW YOU LOOK AT IT. NO NEEDLES STUCK IN MY NECK/SKULL...SO IN A WAY THAT WAS GOOD BECAUSE THE DR DETERMINED IT WOULD DO NO GOOD & PUT ME INTO MORE PAIN THAN WHAT I ALREADY AM EXPERIENCING DAILY. BUT BEING TO THE NEWS IT COULD BE TWO YEARS OR NEVER ON HEALING WASN'T WHAT I EXPECTED TO HEAR. ALOT OF TEARS HAVE BEEN SHED. BUT TODAY I HAVE DETERMINED I WILL TRY TO MAKE THE BEST OF EVERY DAY, BECAUSE I STILL HAVE MY LIFE. SO THROUGH PAIN KILLERS, JOURNALING & CREATING I WILL GET THROUGH THIS. I'VE BEEN LAYING LOW ALL DAY LONG, THAT TRIP ALWAYS DOES ME IN FOR A COUPLE OF DAYS, IT'S ALMOST TIME FOR THE KIDS TO GET HOME SO I'M GOING TO GO DO A LITTLE SCRAPPIN TO PASS TIME SO THAT WAY I WON'T FOCUS ON BEING WORRIED ABOUT EVERYONE GETTING HOME SAFELY ON THESE ICY ROADS....SURE WILL BE HAPPY WHEN SPRING GETS HERE!!!

patience...

after a long time waiting Tim finally showed me how to upload a photo!! It took forever due to dial up, but this is a pic of 3 out of 6 of our furry babies being teased by food so mommy could catch a photo of them together. From left to right Munchkin (daddy's baby...very spoiled), midnight(the mother) & Lucky.

TIME...

WHERE DID TIME GO? I CANNOT BELIEVE IT IS JAN. 3RD ALREADY...I HAVEN'T BLOGGED IN SO LONG. GUESS TIME GOT AWAY FROM ME WITH ALL THE DRS APPTS, HOLIDAY STUFF & TRYING TO TAKE CARE OF THINGS. I CERTAINLY HOPE YOU ALL HAD A WONDERFUL CHRISTMAS, I DID THIS YEAR SPENT TIME WITH FAMILY & TRULY JUST ENJOYED THE MAJORITY OF IT EXCEPT THE SHOPPING PART. SADLY BECAUSE OF PAIN I COULD ONLY DO BITS AT A TIME, WHICH I'M SURE WAS FRUSTRAITING FOR TIM & OF COURSE WE WAIT UNTIL THE LAST MINUTE EVERY YEAR. THE KIDS GOT A WII GAME SYSTEM & GUITAR HERO BAND SET. WE ALSO GOT THEM A FEW OTHER SMALLER THINGS WHICH THEY WERE HAPPY WITH. TIM CERTAINLY SPOILED ME THIS YEAR, (AS HE DOES EVERY XMAS) SLICE & ACCESSORIES DIE CUTTING SYSTEM, WIDE ANGLE LENS & TELESCOPIC LENS FOR MY DIGITAL CAMERA WHICH I DESPERATLY REALLY NEED TO LEARN HOW TO USE MANUAL FUNCTIONS NOW, GIFT CARDS, ETC; THE KIDS GOT ME NICE THINGS ALSO SLIPPERS, A NECK MASSAGER/HEAT THING, CANDLES, & MANY OTHER THINGS.....HUBBY IS HAPPY WITH A NEW TABLE SAW, MATS & WINDSHEILD WIPERS FOR HIS TRUCK & A FEW OTHER THINGS. WAS A GOOD XMAS! TOTALLY UNEXPECTED. THEN NEW YEARS WAS A NICE NIGHT JUST ATE SOME SNACKS & PLAYED BOARD GAMES WITH THE KIDS. TIM CAME DOWN WITH A COLD. HERES WISHIN EVERYONE A HAPPY NEW YEAR...HOPE IT'S A GREAT ONE FOR EVERYONE!